So last night we dropped in on our friend Aleksey to check out his new, very gorgeous, apartment in Amsterdam. It’s still in semi-building site mode with lots of little things that need finishing. But all his belongings have been moved in, the moving boxes piled high. With that in mind, we brought with us our own kettle, cups, spoons, tea, coffee, milk and a nice bottle of plonk to christen the new place.
The one thing we DIDN’T bring was a bottle opener. But I told everyone not to worry, because I saw how to open a bottle of wine on You Tube with nothing more than a good pair of leather shoes.
Aleksey had a quick rummage round and found a pair of black leather shoes and set me to work. It’s been a while since I had seen the video, but I knew it had something to do with whacking the bottom of the bottle hard and square with the shoe, with the resulting internal pressure slowing forcing the cork out of the bottle, just enough that we could pry it out with our teeth. Aleksey, being a man of science and logic (he’s an architect) assured our lovely, but very sceptical ladies, that this was an idea founded on sound scientific principles and that I knew what I was doing.
A couple of hard, solid whacks and I could see the cork was starting to peak from the lip of the bottle. So I showed Herself in a “See, you’re hubby knows what he’s doing” kind of way. She of course, gave her “Yeah, right” style of reassurance. But the cork was not coming out as quickly as I remembered on You Tube.
A bit of elbow grease was all that was needed, or so I thought. And then it happened. The bottle made a “pop” sound and the nectar of the gods spilled all over the floor. The bottle had cracked wide open and spilled the wine everywhere. It’s was reminiscent of someone cracking a bottle of champagne against the hull of a newly launched cruise ship….”I Christen this apartment and all who live in it!“.
Thank the Gods that Aleksey’s place is still in building site mode. His gorgeous new oak flooring still has a protective layer on it, which meant that my incompetence didn’t end up ruining anything, other than my pride, and I should hopefully be allowed back to his place, only next time with wine that has a twisty cap on it instead of a cork. 😉
We salvaged the evening by doing just that, and headed down to the local market to buy another bottle. But given how pristine his new walls are, I don’t think we’ll be having another go at wine opening with shoes (see the video below) any time soon just so we can prove the girls right 🙂
C’est la vie